Joyce Meyer: welcome to today’s program.  We’re talking about the action of love. Love is an action. And if you take the steps to express love to people, it will improve your life and the lives of those that you love. Pastor Tommy Barnett joins me today to discuss this topic. Well, pastor, it’s wonderful to have you back.

Pastor Tommy Barnett:  yes, and I love the subject!

Joyce Meyer: I think you and I could sit and talk about this just like… I love to hear practical stories of how people actually showed love to somebody because it’s very important to me — and I actually feel like god’s given me a mandate to try to do this with the years that he’s going to let me remain here — it’s very important to me that people everywhere learn to begin to show love in their everyday life — at work, the marketplace, at school, to people you meet on the street, people you know, but especially even with people you don’t know. We need to really realize that jesus said, “you are the light of the world, and don’t put your light under a bushel.” so I want us today to talk about the practical side of love. Why don’t you tell us some things; maybe you’ve got some good stories you can tell us, some things that have happened to you over the years.

Pastor Barnett: I love what you said:  you’ve got to say it. It’s important that you say what you feel.  First of all, when you say what you feel, it makes you feel better. When I say “I love you” it touches my emotions. Psychologists tell us today that it’s not how much we love people that matters; it’s how much they feel that we love them. That’s why it’s important that you touch your children, give them a hug, pat them on the back, wrestle with your little children. Joyce Meyer Ministries tells us about that touch, that feel, means so much. Several years ago there was a young man who came to my office. He was a big ol’ strapping guy. He played football — big. He sat down in my office and he wanted an appointment with me. I said, “what’s on your heart?” he said, “well, pastor, uh, uh, well, uh, uh…” and the guy stuttered and stammered and just kept on.

Joyce Meyer Online – Finally I said, “what is it?” he just kept on stuttering. Finally he just blurted out, “I love you!” and jumped up and ran out of the room, and I had to chase the guy down. Come to find out that his dad had never told him that he ever loved him.

Joyce Meyer shares here story. My mother got up every morning, combed her hair, put her makeup on, and she’d put on a fairly decent set of clothes even if she was going to just clean house that day. That’s what she did. Well, you know what? I never planned to do that. I don’t have a sign that says: Get up and get dressed. I just get up and do that. I would venture to say that in my whole entire lifetime, unless I was sick, I can remember maybe one or two days where I just kept my pajamas on all day and didn’t put any makeup on or comb my hair. I’m not putting anybody down who likes to do that. That’s not what this is about. I’m just simply saying that I followed her example and didn’t even really fully realize that’s where I got it from. Your children will end up doing a lot of the things that they see you do and you’ll end up not liking them for some of the things that you taught them. My father, on the other hand, also had a great influence on my life. He was angry, controlling, manipulative, got upset every time things didn’t go his way, and I turned out to be the exact same way and God had to work with me to overcome that. Joyce Meyer Ministries teaches us that we are having a greater influence on people than what we can ever even begin to imagine. Can somebody say amen? Amen!: The thing that influences people I believe more than anything is our words, our attitudes, our actions, our behavior, and our choices: Every choice that we make, every word that we speak, every attitude that we have.

Joyce Meyer Online- I believe you can even teach your children to stay calm in adversity just by staying calm in adversity but if they see you get upset every time something doesn’t go right, then they’re going to also get upset every time something doesn’t go right. Amen? Amen.: Your life is a message.

Joyce Meyer shares her story. I wasn’t having a good influence on my children. I had a bad temper. I was manipulative, selfish, self-centered, controlling. I got upset every time I didn’t get my way. It doesn’t matter how many times you take your kids to church, if you’re not behaving the way that you should behave at home behind closed doors, it all becomes hypocritical to them. And actually, I believe that we can almost do more damage to call ourselves a Christian and not act like one than if we just shut up about the whole thing and don’t say anything. Whoo!: Amen? Amen.: Well, I had to come to the sad realization that I was on my way to heaven but I wasn’t going to take anybody with me. I was born again, I loved God, I knew the message of salvation by grace, and I really believed in Jesus and I believed that I would have gone to heaven. Joyce Meyer Ministries teaches us that there are going to be a lot of immature people that will be saved just barely by fire. They won’t get any reward for any real good pure works that they’ve done because works done for the wrong reason will all be burned up in the fire on judgment day. There is a reward for Christians. We won’t be judged on salvation because if we believe in Jesus, that’s it, but what we do here on the earth will be looked at and will be judged and we will receive rewards for what we’ve done or we will lose rewards for what we’ve done. I think the bible refers to it as “the great white throne judgment.” I’m not an expert in all those things but we do have to realize that there is going to come a day when we’re going to have to stand before God and give an account of our lives.  Joyce Meyerasks, why should I let you into heaven? I believe in Jesus. Okay, you’re in. Your name’s right here in the lamb’s book of life. Come in. Okay, now let’s talk about a few other things, Joyce. What have you done with your time? What did you do with your gifts and your talents? What did you do with your money? Well, I wasted that. Well, I wasted that. I was afraid so I dug a hole and I hid that because I was afraid. I was afraid.

Joyce Meyer Online – We can have or we can lose rewards but even more than being interested in what kind of reward we’re going to get when we get to heaven, I believe – and this is something we are not concerned enough about – I believe we need to be very concerned about whether or not our lives are witnessing to other people and whether or not somebody is going to stay out of hell and go to heaven because of the way we have lived.

I don’t care what it costs me, I’m going on with God. Tonight at Joyce Meyer Ministries, I’m going to say a “yes” to God and I don’t even know what I’m saying “yes” to, but I’m going to trust him that he’s the one who created me and he’s the only one who knows how to run my life. I want that divine exchange: Here, Jesus, I give you everything I am and I give you everything I’m not and I want everything you’ve got, because your stuff’s a lot better than mine. Isaiah 54:4: fear not, for you shall not be ashamed; neither be confounded and depressed, for you shall not be put to shame. For you shall forget the shame of your youth, – wow! – and you shall not seriously remember the reproach of your widowhood any more. Awesome! The word of God is so full of wonderful encouragement.  Joyce Meyer asks us,  How about Isaiah 54:17? No weapon formed against you shall prosper. Whoo!: We could just have a Holy Ghost meeting off that one scripture: No weapon formed against you shall prosper but every tongue that rises up against you in judgment, you shall show to be in the wrong. This peace, righteousness, security, and triumph over opposition is the heritage, the inheritance of the servant of the Lord. Let me end with this scripture: John 10:10 in the bible says: The thief comes only to kill, steal, and destroy, but Jesus said, – and I love this! – “I came…” Whew! Well, come on somebody. “I came…” But God… The devil came to do this, this, that, that, and something else but Jesus said: I came and got right in the middle of it. Hallelujah! I came, that you might have and enjoy your life and have it in abundance to the full, until it overflows. Don’t let anybody ever tell you anything different. God has a great life for you. – Joyce Meyer Ministries.

Joyce Meyer Online: I was shocked that it was in the crossword puzzle, but I was more shocked that the kid came up to my locker — I was not even on a team; I was coaching — and he asked me for the answer, and I didn’t have the answer. I said, “I’ll get back to you with it.”

Joyce Meyer asks us, are you too busy trying to climb the ladder of success only to get to the top of the ladder and find out your ladder’s leaning against the wrong building? Are you failing to pay attention to some of the most precious relationships in your life because you’re so busy trying to succeed in the business world? When you’re on your deathbed you’re not going to ask for your bank balance, I can promise you that. You’re going to want your friends. Are you killing yourself with stress because you’re trying to have another and another and another and more and another and another? Are you too busy to pray? Are you too busy to fellowship with God? Are you too busy to do acts of kindness for one another? Are you entangled in the affairs of civilian life? Joyce Meyer Online tells us that if all we can do is worry about our stuff and how to get more, and how to take care of what we have, and worry about what people think of us, worry about this and worry about that, and be involved all tangled up in our own problems… You can even get entangled in somebody else’s problems and it will keep you from acting like a soldier in the army of God. This has nothing to do with my message but I’ll give it to you free: you cannot help somebody who does not want to be helped. I think we all fall into that, and I’ve certainly been guilty because I’m a rescuer and I finally realized that Jesus didn’t go around trying to make people let him help them. He helped those who came to him and wanted help and were ready for help. So just be careful about getting entangled in somebody else’s mess and spending your time trying to see their life improve when you want it more than they do.

Joyce Meyer Ministries: Two days later I forgot about it. As I thought about it, I found the answer, I went to him and said, “this is the answer.”

Joyce Meyer says, some things I may get a handle on right away, some might take me a few hours, some might even take me a day or two but I’m telling you right now, in Christ we always triumph if we decide to. You know what? You can smile whether you feel like it or not. Just try it. Go look at yourself in the morning and just go… You’ll make yourself feel better. You might even laugh! The glory of God is man fully alive. When I talk about this being fully alive, I don’t mean that you have to giggle through the day. I don’t mean you have to be like this radical… Whew! Hoo! Hoo! I’m talking about putting your whole heart into everything you do. And I’m talking about giving a good report. And when people say, “how are you?” you say, “doing great in Jesus! Happy, blessed, glad I’m saved,” or whatever you want to say, but not this always have something new to complain about. Psalm 115:17 says: the dead praise not the Lord… So nothing dead gives glory to God — not a dead attitude, not dead words. And if there’s anything we need to do, we need to learn how to discern life from death. We need to know when we’re touching life, and we need to know when we’re touching death, and if we’re touching death and we know that doesn’t praise the Lord, then we need to just say, “I don’t have anything to do with that.”Joyce Meyer Ministries teaches us that in Matthew 8:22 Jesus said to a guy, “follow me.” “Well, Lord, my father’s getting old and he’s probably going to die soon, so can I bury him first and then I’ll follow you.” Do you know what Jesus said? “Let the dead bury the dead; you follow me.” Some of you are still messing around with dead stuff that God got finished with so long ago that when you talk to him about it, he doesn’t even know what you’re talking about. I have a revelation for you: if the horse has been dead 10 years, dismount. Joyce Meyer said that it is time to get off and get a new ride. You’ve heard that saying, “beating a dead horse. Beating a dead horse.” It’s like you’re still mad about something somebody did 20 years ago; just get over it. They don’t care that you’re mad. They’re out having a good time.

Joyce Meyer Online: He went to his locker, pulled down the paper, put the answer in and then continued it — but he was on hold for two days.

Joyce Meyer: We just want God to do something for me. We start out like the prodigal: Give me, give me, give me, give me, give me, give me. Give me my part of the inheritance. I want it now, now, now, now! The thing that I think is interesting about that whole story about the prodigal son is his father didn’t even argue with him; he just gave it to him. Sometimes I think god just has to give us what we think we want just to prove to us that that’s not really what we do want.

From the Amazon river to the sands of Egypt… Hyderabad, India… From the Mississippi gulf coast… In Zobecho, Ethiopia… All the way over here in Mumbai, India. At Joyce Meyer ministries, we’ve streamlined ways to make the most of the donations we receive. Our financial transparency policy makes it easy for you to view where the funds are being spent each year. We want to invite you to partner with us. If you’re already a partner, consider increasing your monthly gift. Be sure to sign up for auto-debit partnership. That way there’s no check to send and you’ll know your monthly donation is getting where it’s needed. When you sign up for auto-debit, we’re going to send you the “battlefield of the mind devotional” book as a free thank you gift. It’s yours free when you sign up for auto-debit partnership. Call right now. Joyce Meyer encouraged us to begin making a difference in someone’s life — someone who needs love, food, shelter, salvation; someone who needs you.

Joyce Meyer: Welcome back to the program. Author and pastor R.T. Kendall is with me today and we’re talking about how to totally forgive ourselves. We sent a crew out to gather questions for this topic. We call this segment “everyday dilemmas.” This question comes from Sandra.

Sandra: When you’ve been mean to somebody and you cannot go back and ask for forgiveness because that person is dead, how can you forgive yourself? – Joyce Meyer Ministries.

Joyce Meyer Online: And that was a great inspiration to me as a witness because he himself saw what he wanted to see in me, and I was just sitting there minding my own business. And I didn’t even have the answer; I didn’t have my bible with me.

Joyce Meyer tells us, with you getting in the middle, you are trying to be me, and you are keeping that person from connecting with me. So you need to just let me sever everything that’s unhealthy, and you just be healthy with that person.” I think sometimes we want something so much from another person that we end up not understanding how to just be healthy. I’ve made so many mistakes in my marriage and with my friends that if I had friends who just gave up on me, then I would be written off. I also think it’s very important to confront. I recently had a little situation where I have a friend I absolutely adore and there was something that was said and that happened, and I thought, “I can either just pull away and she’ll never know why and there’ll be this breach between us, or I can call her and I can say, ‘I want a relationship with you.'” And that’s what I did. I said, “I want a relationship with you, and I need to tell you what I’ve heard and let me tell you what’s happened. I don’t even know how to navigate this, but I know that at the end of this phone call, I want a relationship with you.

So let’s figure out how we’re going to walk through this together as two women of God and come out of this stronger.”  It was amazing because some of us are just making it up as we go along, Joyce, because this hasn’t really been patterned for us. So I was like, “I don’t know what I’m asking you to do, but all I know is I want a relationship with you, so how can we move forward?” Joyce Meyer Ministries tells us that  it was just one of the most amazing, restorative things. She wrote me a letter afterwards and said, “I just appreciate it that you didn’t just pull away.”

Joyce Meyer Online: That’s good. I remember Dave telling me out in the business world or in the sports world, wherever you’re at, people will test you.

Joyce Meyer Ministries said that you can turn them around. You changed me; you can change them. The Lord has even been challenging me, you know: Once you ask me for something, Joyce, don’t come back and just keep asking me for it over and over; just thank me that I’m working. Now, I’m not trying to make a new law here, but I’m just saying what God’s been dealing with me about: That when we ask him for something, he is faithful and he does go to work in our behalf. And just because we don’t see it or feel it, that doesn’t mean that God’s not working. So what we need to do then is start saying: God, I thank you that you are working. According to Joyce Meyer, I’m looking forward to my breakthrough. I believe it’s going to come just any time now because I believe you’re working. Not: Oh, God, I don’t know why you’re not doing anything. I don’t see anything, and I don’t feel anything. It looks to me like nothing’s ever going to change, and I’m just so down and so depressed and so discouraged. How do you think you’d feel if one of your kids needed a pair of shoes and they came to you and said: Mom, my shoes have holes in them and I need new shoes. Joyce Meyer Online, And you say: Okay, Saturday I’ll take you to get new shoes. Ten minutes later they come back: Mom, I’ve got holes in my shoes and I don’t… My feet are on the ground. When are you going to get me shoes? I already told you; we’ll go Saturday. Half an hour later: Mom, I’ve got these holes in my shoes, and my feet are on the ground and my feet are cold. I just don’t understand why you haven’t taken me to get shoes. I’m working on it, son. I’ve got a plan here. I’ve got it worked into my schedule. On Saturday you’re going to get your shoes. Joyce Meyer Ministries shows tomorrow morning: Well, mom, I don’t understand why I don’t have my shoes. What we need to say is: Thank God, Saturday’s coming! Amen?

Joyce Meyer Online: If you say that you are a Christian, they will push your buttons and do things in front of you to try to find out.

Joyce Meyer Ministries teaches us that the world has to see it shining through us. The world has to see Christ in our personality. The world has to hear him coming out of our mouth, and has to see him in our attitude. So many people… Yes, they’re legally and positionally born again, but they never work with the Holy Spirit to let that salvation be worked out through them so it can do somebody else some good. Joyce Meyersaid that not only does God want us to go to heaven, he wants us to take some people with us. Amen? So he says work out your own salvation, work with the Holy Spirit, keep a tender conscience, be serious about this.

Joyce Meyer reads verse 13 is important: [not in your own strength]… –Thank God, we can’t do it ourself– …Joyce Meyer teaches us that for it is God who is all the while effectually at work in you [energizing and creating in you the power and desire], both to will and to work for his good pleasure and satisfaction and delight. Oh, oh – verse 14: Do all things… Without grumbling. –That includes getting dressed and getting to the platform– do all things without grumbling and faultfinding… –that includes leaving the meeting and finding out there’s a major storm going on and you’re not going to be able to get to where you wanted to go when you wanted to get there, or you’re going to have to get soaking wet to do it– do all things — your laundry, your dishes, the grocery shopping, driving in traffic, going to the job you don’t care for, paying your bills that you made, be married for 50 years. Because no matter how long you date somebody, you just don’t know all that you’re going to know when you start living with them. Amen? Joyce Meyer Ministries said after that you get the good, bad and the ugly.

Joyce Meyer Online: I think one of the things that you guys both have probably experienced is how you handle people telling you dirty jokes.